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Ms. Green:
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Hello, Doctor Balis.
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Dr. Balis:
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Hello, Anna. Are you going to sit down?
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Ms. Green:
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Maybe.
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Dr. Balis:
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What's up?
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Ms. Green:
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I'm in a very bad mood, Doctor. But don't take it personally.
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Dr. Balis:
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Thank you for the warning and I won't.
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Ms. Green:
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I think Martin might be back.
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Dr. Balis:
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In San Francisco?
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Ms. Green:
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I think so.
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Dr. Balis:
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You didn't actually see him?
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Ms. Green:
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I'm not really sure. I think it was him. I was too busy hiding to really know. But I think he's back.
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Dr. Balis:
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Do you want to tell me what happened?
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Ms. Green:
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Caren and Greg showed up at my door Saturday morning. I guess Caren felt really bad about us drifting apart like that, so she dragged Greg to come see me and patch things up.
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Dr. Balis:
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That sounds very nice.
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Ms. Green:
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I'm glad she did it. I was feeling really bad about losing her as a friend and I'm glad to know that she was suffering, too. Greg, I think, was perfectly happy not hanging around me anymore--I was too weird for him--but Caren wouldn't let him. So they took time off their busy wedding-planning schedule to take me out for a day and talk things back to normal, so to speak.
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Dr. Balis:
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Good.
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Ms. Green:
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We went to the Seal Rock Inn for brunch and then walked on the beach. It was a very low tide and we founds lots of sand dollars and...but it's not very important. As we were walking along the water, I saw a man in a large blue sweatshirt running on the beach. I wasn't sure it was Martin, but my heart fell and I quickly bent down to look for something in the surf so that he wouldn't get a chance to see me as he ran by. I didn't say anything to Caren, but I was dying inside. Then, as we were walking up to our car, I saw the same man again returning from his run. I'm pretty sure he didn't see me that time either.
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Dr. Balis:
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But you're not sure it was Martin?
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Ms. Green:
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I was too busy hiding to get a clear view of his face. But his mannerisms seemed very familiar. But the weird part was that when we went to get burritos at Gordo's--about twenty blocks away from the beach--I saw that man again. That time, he was crossing Geary Street--I recognized the blue sweatshirt. It was as if he was following me.
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Dr. Balis:
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Do you think he was?
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Ms. Green:
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Oh, I don't know. I don't know, Doctor! Maybe? I never got a good look, so I'm not sure it was Martin.
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Dr. Balis:
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You said that you still get a lot of messages from him...
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Ms. Green:
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Nothing that would make me believe that he was back in town. In fact, I thought that he was graduating sometime this week. There's a ceremony. He couldn't be here. And yet...
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Dr. Balis:
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You only saw that man in a blue sweatshirt three times last Saturday, right?
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Ms. Green:
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Not exactly.
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Dr. Balis:
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What do you mean? Did you see him again?
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Ms. Green:
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No, I didn't see him again. But...oh, Doctor, this is really spooky.
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Dr. Balis:
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What?
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Ms. Green:
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When I left home today, on the sidewalk in front of the entrance to my building was a drawing.
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Dr. Balis:
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On a piece of paper?
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Ms. Green:
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No. It was huge and was made with chalk directly on the sidewalk.
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Dr. Balis:
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Do you have a picture or can you describe the drawing?
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Ms. Green:
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I don't have a picture. As I was leaving the house, the superintendent--a sweet old Italian guy--was washing it out with a hose and a brush, cursing about pornography. But it was like those Martin sketches he was sending me. It was a headless female figure. You could see pubic hair and I think only one nipple, but I'm not sure. The body was nude but for a pair of boots which somehow turned into gloves. One nipple was tied to the rail of the steps going up to the door.
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Dr. Balis:
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Sounds like Martin's work, all right. Based on that, I would say it's safe to assume that Martin was back in town, at least as of today.
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Ms. Green:
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Yeah.
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Dr. Balis:
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You haven't been home since this morning?
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Ms. Green:
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No, I came here straight from work.
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Dr. Balis:
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Did you have a chance to check your phone messages at home?
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Ms. Green:
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Nothing.
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Dr. Balis:
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No messages?
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Ms. Green:
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No messages.
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Dr. Balis:
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Are you worried about your personal safety?
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Ms. Green:
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I don't think so. Martin is all about getting abuse, not giving it. But I have felt sick all day. My stomach hurts and I've got a terrible headache.
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Dr. Balis:
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Feeling anxious?
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Ms. Green:
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Very. If this was Friday, I would consider going to my parents' for the weekend and skipping going home all together. But I have to be at work tomorrow.
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Dr. Balis:
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Are you afraid of facing Martin?
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Ms. Green:
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I guess so. I've always known that some day we'd meet again. It was inevitable--if only at some computer convention or symposium or something. But now I feel so unready to deal with him. It's like I feel too weak to be around him right now.
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Dr. Balis:
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What are you worried about, Anna?
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Ms. Green:
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It's just that I miss him. Or miss being with him or something. I thought he was a very interesting guy, if not for all that other stuff. But he makes me feel very bad about myself. See? It's just too much emotional baggage that I guess I haven't dealt with yet. The last thing I want to do is be around Martin.
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Dr. Balis:
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Do you think that Martin could persuade you to go out with him again?
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Ms. Green:
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I don't want to do that.
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Dr. Balis:
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But do you think that Martin could talk you into it? Let's say he asked you just to have coffee with him and talk, would you do it?
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Ms. Green:
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I don't know. It's so tempting even when it's just you saying it.
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Dr. Balis:
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I see.
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Ms. Green:
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Oh, don't be disappointed with me, Doctor. I know I'm weak. Maybe...maybe...
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Dr. Balis:
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Yes?
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Ms. Green:
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Do you think that you might consider...I would like to...it would be just for tonight, I promise!
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Dr. Balis:
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Consider what?
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Ms. Green:
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I could stay with you? And this way, you would save me from being so weak and getting myself into trouble?
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Dr. Balis:
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If you are so sure that you'll be in trouble by talking to Martin, then just say no.
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Ms. Green:
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But I don't know if I can do that, Doctor. I don't think I'm strong enough.
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Dr. Balis:
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I think you are.
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Ms. Green:
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No, Doctor, no. You've got to help me. I would be as quiet as a mouse. I promise. You wouldn't even know I'm there. Please? Please, Doctor Balis? Just this one time?
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Dr. Balis:
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Anna, you know I can't do that...
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Ms. Green:
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But what if I said that I am afraid of him? Would you then?
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Dr. Balis:
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No. In that case, I would suggest you stay someplace else, perhaps. Are you afraid?
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Ms. Green:
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Doctor, I promise I would be a very good girl. I would do nothing to make you regret this. Please?
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Dr. Balis:
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Anna, if you feel so strongly about not going home tonight, how about contacting Caren and asking her to let you stay with her?
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Ms. Green:
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Caren is now living with Greg. I couldn't do that.
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Dr. Balis:
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What about another friend? How about Kathy?
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Ms. Green:
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Well...
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Dr. Balis:
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I'm not your only option, Anna.
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Ms. Green:
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I guess I could stay on the couch at SII's programming lounge. I've done that before. Or under my desk...
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Dr. Balis:
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That's pathetic, Anna. I'm sure Kathy would be happy to help you out. And she knows about your whole story with Martin and might be good to talk to tonight.
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Ms. Green:
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You would be better.
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Dr. Balis:
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Thank you. But...
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Ms. Green:
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All right, all right. I'll call Kathy. But if anything happens to me, Doctor, it would be all your fault.
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Dr. Balis:
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I think you'll be okay, Anna.
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Ms. Green:
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I better make the call now or I might miss her.
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Dr. Balis:
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Fine. Our time is up anyway. Remember, you can call at any time, if there's a problem...
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Ms. Green:
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I know. I like the idea of you coming to save me, Doctor--Charles to my rescue!
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Dr. Balis:
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Goodbye, Anna.
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Ms. Green:
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Good night, Doctor Balis.
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###
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Doctor Balis' Notes on this Session
Transcripts of Anna Green's Communications
