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Dr. Balis:
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Hi Peter. How's it going?
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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Fine. Great.
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Dr. Balis:
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I'm glad to hear that. So you haven't been bothered by any more of the seizures we were talking about?
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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No, I haven't been bothered. I've been learning a lot, but it doesn't bother me; it's confirming a lot of things I'd suspected already.
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Dr. Balis:
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I don't understand. Are you saying you have been experiencing more of these episodes, but you enjoy having them; or are you talking about learning from the ones you had before?
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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I have been projecting myself onto the astral plane, but I wouldn't say it was about enjoyment, it's much deeper than that.
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Dr. Balis:
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You have been doing this at work again?
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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No. Remember what you were saying last time about the flicker of the monitor maybe having something to do with setting me off? Well I took that monitor home and I worked at it for a while, but nothing happened. I was about to write it off but then I realized I was missing something--a sort of om-m-m that I always heard when my trances would start. So I thought about it, and then went to the hardware store and got a flourescent fixture--bingo. It works even better than it did in my cubicle.
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Dr. Balis:
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So you managed to induce a seizure at home with this set-up?
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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Stop calling them seizures. We're talking about a trance state. Somehow I've become able to enter a state of non-ordinary reality and I don't think a medical term like seizures comes close to describing some of the most powerful experiences of my life. And yes, I've used the monitor and light as meditation tools and I've been able to enter the trance state a few times. Mystics have been exploring different realities for thousands of years before doctors had anything to say about it and, if you looked, you'd see this kind of exploration is the foundation of every religion in the world. If a guy named Jacob came to you and told you he'd seen angels climbing a ladder, you'd probably give him some kind of pill to make it stop, wouldn't you?
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Dr. Balis:
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Possibly. Every case is different. But I think you are messing around with something dangerous here. Epilepsy can creep up on you; once the pathways in the brain are established, seizures...sorry, trances can happen more frequently and severely. This is not something you want to have happen any more, I hope you realize that. If this only happens with this one particular monitor and you've removed it, then we can hope it won't happen again and that's the end of it. Believe me, that would be wonderful.
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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Look, even after I took all those tests and had my brain scanned, you couldn't say for sure if I had epilepsy or not. So I'm not going to call myself an epileptic. I'm a traveller in different dimensions.
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Dr. Balis:
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Just because I can't point to some part of your brain and pinpoint what's wrong doesn't mean that the diagnosis is incorrect. Most epilepsies are like that. You can't confirm them until autopsy, and sometimes not even then.
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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I bet you can hardly wait.
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Dr. Balis:
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Come on Peter. I'm telling you this as someone who cares about you.
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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And it's your job.
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Dr. Balis:
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Yes, it's also my job. That doesn't make it less true. I don't know how to put it more plainly. All I can tell you, based on what I know, is that you seem to be a borderline case, susceptible to epileptic episodes--trances, call them what you like--and you should try to supress them if you can. If avoiding flashing lights and buzzing noises is all it takes, that's fine; but otherwise I'd suggest drug therapy. Have you discussed this with Dr. Hardaway?
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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No, I don't need anything from that old quack. You doctors think you know everything, and you've got the right to tell everyone what to do; even though you're too blind to see the most important stuff in the world.
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Dr. Balis:
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If you didn't get along with Dr. Hardaway I'd be happy to recommend somebody else you could go to for a second opinion.
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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Right, another guy that thinks exactly the same. Well, no thanks. I've already got a second opinion.
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Dr. Balis:
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Oh? From whom?
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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Remember I told you I was going to a psychic? Well she's taken a special interest in my case, and she's put a lot of time into building up my spiritual immunities so I can deal with the incredibly heavy shit that's been coming my way on the spiritual plane. In fact it's her support that has kept me as strong as I've managed to be, and helped me keep to the path.
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Dr. Balis:
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This is the one who said you were going to die?
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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She said there was a strong chance of it, with the powerful forces I've been invoking. She thinks I can pull through though, with her help. She's doing everything she can to build up my strength.
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Dr. Balis:
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Really? What does she do?
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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I don't want to hear you making fun of things you can't understand.
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Dr. Balis:
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I'm not making fun, I just want to know. Call it professional curiosity. I need to build people's strength up too at times; maybe she's developed a technique I could use.
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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Uh, I don't think so. It has a lot to do with her female energy. You see, I've got strong male energy that needs to be directed; but only the female can do that.
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Dr. Balis:
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I guess that leaves me out. Was she ever with you when you induced your trance states?
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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Yes, she helped a lot. She's an amazingly wise woman. She has an herbal tea for just about any problem you could name, she can cast horoscopes, read the tarot, you name it. When I broke through, it was probably the breathing exercises she taught me that got me there, and afterwards it was her massages that brought me back.
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Dr. Balis:
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It does sound like she she is putting in a lot of effort. What did you say her name was?
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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I didn't say. Her name is secret; she only tells it to people who need to know. But she lets people call her Serena.
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Dr. Balis:
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Did she tell you her true name?
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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I was granted that honor. But I can't reveal it.
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Dr. Balis:
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Then I won't ask you to. Is there anything about her that you would like to tell me? What does she look like?
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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She's got dark brown hair, eyes like deep black pools. I guess she's really a pretty small woman, but she's got this huge aura surrounding her so she seems larger. She must be forty at least, but she's still muscular and firm. Really though, it's her soul that hits you; the body seems like it can hardly contain it. You'd have to meet her to understand what I'm talking about.
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Dr. Balis:
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And she's been coming over to your place regularly to give you special counseling, that sort of thing?
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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House calls may be extinct in Western medicine, but they're still an important part of alternative treatment.
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Dr. Balis:
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So she comes over, tells your fortune, gives you tea, massages, and spiritual advice, while you experiment with your consciousness?
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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She's become my teacher and spiritual guide, I guess you could say. I'd really be lost without her, that's for sure, trying to deal with these intense cosmic forces. But she knows how to cope with all the entities I've been channelling and she's got ways to infuse me with some of her power when the time comes for me to cross over.
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Dr. Balis:
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How does that work?
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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Ever heard of Tantra? It's a magical system worked out thousands of years ago in Asia by highly advanced yogi who were totally at home in different dimensions that we just get glimpses of today. Just by using our bodies in certain ways, we can attune ourselves to the spiritual elements that reach inside us and connect with everything in nature, including entities science has no clue about.
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Dr. Balis:
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I've heard of Tantric sex. Is that what you've been doing?
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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This is as different from what you call sex as flying is from walking. There's no way to explain it; it's like trying to tell a deaf person about music. For one thing, the object is totally different. In sex, the main thing the man is trying to do is to bring himself off, and maybe the woman too if she's lucky; in tantra, for me to have an orgasm would be an admission of failure. The idea is to transcend the material plane totally, while balancing the male and female principles exactly, so the energy is conserved and channelled upwards. I can't tell you how lucky I am to have finally found someone who could show me these things.
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Dr. Balis:
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Are you in love with this woman?
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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My god, one outdated Western concept after another! Romantic love, what a side-track. Let me tell you, this is something totally different and infinitely higher.
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Dr. Balis:
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I see. Well, we're out of time, but I'd like to talk to you some more. How about next week?
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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I don't know, I'm really feeling okay and I've been awfully busy. I'll think about it, how about that?
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Dr. Balis:
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Give me a call when you want to set up an appointment, but I think it's important.
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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I'll see you again pretty soon, don't worry.
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Dr. Balis:
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I'll try not to. Goodbye Peter.
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Mr. Hossfeld:
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Goodbye Charles.
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###
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Doctor Balis' Notes on this Session
Transcripts of Peter Hossfeld's Communications
